Back to School, Back to Busy: How to Prioritize Connecting With Your Partner
Back to Busy
Summer vacation has come to its end. You’re getting back into the swing and groove of the school schedule; you have gone over all the checklists that the teachers have sent. You were sure to get pencils, pens, lunch bags, snack bag, and everything else on the list. Suddenly Soccer season is here, so the list begins again cleats, snacks, soccer bag, soccer shoes and the list goes on. Your family has just gotten busier, and schedules are full again. You have everything scheduled, all the practices, back to school nights, games, cheer/dance, but is date night scheduled? Is your marriage on the schedule?
Schedule Time With Your Partner
While you are scheduling all the family events that are to come did you schedule date nights? If not, that’s okay most people do not, however it’s important to connect with your partner and see if there is a specific date that works such as every 3rd Saturday. Often scheduling can feel less spontaneous, not as romantic, however once it becomes more frequent, and more routine the spontaneity will come.
Never Stop Dating Your Partner
There have been studies indicating that those couples who date each other while married are less likely to have marital issues leading towards divorce. Dating can look different for marriage, this could be meeting for a drink, planning a dinner, a movie, renting a hotel room for the two of you. However, you date your spouse it is important that at least 1x a month you do and once every 6 months try to go out of town for the weekend, and if possible once a year go away from a week.
With children this can be a challenge that’s understandable however, keeping your marriage alive is also important for your marriage to keep the love, the life and the joy in your marriage. If you check in with your spouse and ask when the last time you went on a date and they must take a moment to think about when it is, it is time for a date.
Staying Connected with Your Partner
Keeping your marriage alive begins with enjoying each other’s company and being able to have a moment to breathe together. Connection is just as important as communication. Being able to have s et time for the both of you to enjoy each other and talk to one another instead of being passing ships will allow for your marriage to bloom and to begin to enjoy each other again.
The challenge for this blog is to talk with your spouse and explore where you think you would like your first date to be, and schedule it. Once it’s on the calendar it cannot be ignored, if you guys can prioritize your marriage it will not be something you regret.
About the Author:
Leilani Mitchell, LMFT
Leilani Mitchell, LMFT is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist here at California Couples Counseling. Leilani’s areas of specialty include anxiety, relationship issues, couples therapy, parenting, trauma, depression, and CBT.
